Rev. "Suds" Soapbox

So I continue to see these news reports and posts regarding how the Christians and the Muslims have been pushing their agendas through the world courts.

Well, let me point out a few things. I am not a Christian. Nor am I a follower of Islam, Hinduism, Chinese traditional, Buddhism, Primal indigenous, Sikhism, Juche, Spiritism, Judaism, Bahá'í Faith, Jainism, Shinto, Cao Dai, Zoroastrianism, Tenrikyo, Neopaganism, Unitarian Universalism, Rastafari, African traditionalism and diasporic, Humanism, Atheism, Rationalism, Agnosticism or Satanism.

No, friends – I am a SubGenius. And as a SubGenius, I am obligated to show, not only no respect whatsoever to anyone’s delusions, but am bound by the tenets of the sacred texts to ridicule and blaspheme all institutions of madness – this courtesy extending to my own twisted belief system. Yet I will never attempt to stand in the way of those very delusions I mock. And still, I continue to watch the self-righteous scream and shout how their values are under attack!

So what values are those?

Were those values forcing your secular beliefs into the laws that govern the land, and not giving a damn if it infringes on anyone elses beliefs?

Or maybe demanding your voice be heard over all others while forcing others to shut up?

How about allowing the atrocities in the world to continue while you hide behind "Gods Will" as a shield to protect you from taking action?

Or hypocritically condemning the actions of an imaginary enemy while you make allowances and justifications when the need suites you?

And then there is denying others the ability to enter into a sanctified union because you think it will somehow diminish yours?

And let’s not forget demanding critical thinking be replaced with guarded ignorance, while promoting fairy tales and/or dogma in place of science?

And my personal favorite, hiding behind blind faith in order to either protect you from the real world or in order to justify your existence?

But there’s also demanding your god take precedence over all others?

And demanding others have their right to live taken away because they don’t follow your line of thinking?

And the ever popular demanding that desperate people change their beliefs to yours in order to receive your help?

See, I have never called for the death of those who do not believe as I do, because I know you're already dead and just don’t know it yet.

I have never attempted to change someone elses way of thinking, because most folks are too myopically minded to grasp what it is I preach anyway.

My beliefs do not require anyone else to think the way I do in order to support them. And I’m completely content to keep it that way.

I don’t practice what I preach, because I’m not the kind of person I preach to.

And in the end I know I’m right – and when this planet finally burns… Well, let’s just say ‘vindication is an amazing sensation.’

Radicals and fanaticals may be bad, but hiding behind your shepherd as a shield will do nothing to save anyone. Cause no matter how many followers are within your flock, there is one truth that you can never escape. All lambs, eventually, are lead to slaughter. At least it’ll be a party at “Bob’s” house when the end comes, and we'll be grillin' up BBQ lamb chops.

So, I call you out, all people of hypocrisy and apathy. Because even if some people from your flock have done good in this world -- the atrocities, the murders, the torture, the robbing of innocents, the senseless slaughter of untold millions of people, all in the name of your God does put a damper on the whole benign facade.

It is sickening that you hide behind your faith as justification for atrocities. And those who hid behind their faith to shield them from taking action to stop it! You should be hiding behind “Bob” – at least he has a money back guarantee!

In any case, when it comes to shepherds -- I’d rather be a wolf any day. At least then I’d have a fighting chance.